Idea

I really can't bring myself to the idea that I have changed...
who was it that I changed for... or even so...
did I change for myself, or for someone else ?
what was it that actually changed? I can't be happy with this change
this is not me, this me has never been so why now?
the urge to leave everything is stronger by the minute
and the only thing holding me back is you at this point
there is nobody else that might incline me to it
and that is only making it worse...
the fact that I can deign myself to leave everything for
just one person, has never been me... I don't want it to be
but that's the catch... I don't have any idea  on how coming back
that's just how different I am from everybody else
the fact that I don't want this kind of affliction to be part of me
and the simple fact that nobody, not even you understand...
and keep warning me not to fall in love... oh how clueless are they
never found love in a not selfish way, the way I did, with no conditions
no restrictions, and I am beginning to wonder if you see it that way
or you are just afraid to ask what is going on in my mind...
be that as it might... another part of this so amazing change...
is what if I can be happier this way?
this tacit questions, that are never gonna be answered
are those little things, that you seem to answer everytime
every single time you tell me to leave with you, on those
amazing eye glances that you are silently screaming I love you.