silence

the main question, is leaving or stay and wait?
and from there on... would that waiting conclude
on what I am waiting for or just in more time
of deceiving myself into believe something is not there?
there is always gonna be something more important
or a bigger obstacle to stop the most important thing
that you should do right now and that is a simple
and clear fact right in front of me that I cannot pretend
not to see anymore... is killing me and you don't even see it
maybe this way will be easier in a few aspects, in the most direct ones
but the hardest part will be nothing if you are actually willing to go
through with it and really chose  a path for yourself.
at this point I don't care what would it be, but I just need to be
once again, certain, and sure of what I have to be waiting for
I'll change my hair and my name at some point again, but just
being sure of what I am sitting around and waiting for
no deceptions, no secrets, no more holding back from
anybody so I can think clearly once again and figure out
my new plan right now... not in a few months,  not for
the years to come, but for right now, for you and I
our long past is making me doubt and still is not as long as I would wish
safe and truth are never there even though our silence leans towards them.